Photo: Courtesy
In many communities across Kenya, the pressure to have a male child remains a deeply rooted social expectation.
Families without sons often face subtle discrimination, whispered judgments, and the painful stigma of being labeled “incomplete.”
Despite modern conversations around gender equality, the preference for boys persists, shaping decisions, hopes, and even personal relationships. For one couple in Machakos County, this societal pressure became a heavy burden after the birth of three daughters.
“We felt like we were failing, even though we loved our daughters more than anything,” confessed James Muthomi, 34, speaking exclusively to this publication. James and his wife, Esther, 32, say the constant remarks from relatives and neighbors left them anxious and depressed.
“Every family gathering, people would ask, ‘When will you give us a boy?’ It started as jokes, but after a while, it hurt deeply. We began questioning ourselves, our choices, everything.”
Determined to address the issue, the couple sought professional guidance.
“We visited a fertility specialist after reading about gender selection techniques,” James explained.
The doctor advised them on medically safe approaches to family planning, including timing methods, dietary adjustments, and understanding ovulation cycles—practices believed by some specialists to slightly influence the likelihood of having a boy.
“It wasn’t about doing something unnatural; it was about being informed and making decisions responsibly,” James said.
The process, however, was emotionally taxing. Esther recalls long nights of anxiety and guilt.
“I would wake up in the middle of the night, worrying that I was doing something wrong. The social pressure didn’t make it easier,” she admitted. To cope, the couple also sought counseling, where a trained therapist helped them navigate feelings of shame and societal judgment.
“Talking to someone who didn’t judge us helped restore our peace of mind,” Esther said.
Months later, their fourth pregnancy brought hope. Through careful medical guidance and a focus on emotional well-being, they welcomed their first son.
“Holding him for the first time, all that pressure, all the worry—it melted away,” James recalled, tears in his eyes. The couple is quick to emphasize that their journey was about reclaiming dignity in the face of stigma, not undermining the value of their daughters.
“We love all our children equally. But society doesn’t always make that easy,” Esther said.
While the debate on gender preference continues, for James and Esther, knowledge, counseling, and careful medical support made the difference between despair and hope. Get The Full Story Here